Friendships

Friendships are one of the sweetest blessings of life.

I am very good at loving from afar. I have a tough time really showing how much I really care for my friends sometimes. I didn't used to, though. College definitely changed the way I treat my friends. Before that, I believed in and trusted every friend I had. I had wonderful friends while I was away at school, but a few let me down, lied to me, and used me. Those few will always stick with me as lessons in disguise. Besides being hurt, I learned to not trust everyone and to stop expecting every person to be a good one.

Now, I am much more careful about who I allow in my life. I meet new people, and I don't cling onto them as though we will be forever friends. I choose wisely. And I think that's a part of growing up. You want friends around you that build you, not break you, that uplift you, not drag you down, that are kind and honest, not two-faced and deceitful.

But then what do you do with friends you have known your whole life? The friends that were there for your first kiss, the first time you were grounded, the first everything. Some of these can be the greatest forever friends! But some may not have turned out how you had hoped. I am learning that in your mid 20's, you start to see your friends establish themselves. They may not be living down the street anymore, or share the same interests and morals as you. That initial bond diminishes between a few of you. But then there are those friendships that have never changed, no matter where you are on the map or how different your interests are. It's amazing how different people clash and different people are drawn to each other.

Like I said before, I am very good at loving from afar. In some cases, I need to love from afar, because I see a better friendship in that than staying close. Just like it's natural to fall in love, it's so natural to be drawn to some as your close friends and clash with others.

I fight this all the time because I miss how close I used to be to some. My advice to you and myself is to stop fighting it. Part of growing up is choosing your friends wisely, and it's better to have a few good friends that you enjoy spending time with than friends you have to make yourself spend time with. It's natural. Let it be.

Cherish your friendships whether they are close or afar. Enjoy some of life's sweetest gifts, and always be kind.

Sparkling Moments

I live for the sparkling moments when you put on your new show-stopper dress to wear out on the town,

or when the girls get together and share wine, laughs, and good memories,

or the 4th of July when bright colors are everywhere in the sky and the great Red, White, and Blue are worn by every citizen,

or when babies have their first birthday and you truly realize how fast time flies,

or when you have the most amazing night staying in with your lover just laying on the couch in pjs,

or when you accomplish a much longed for achievement,

or when you do something you never thought you could ever do,

or when you feel that forgiveness you needed the most,

or when you wake up on Christmas morning,

or when you learn what true love really is,

or when you are there for a friend who needs a shoulder,

or when you lose something but God blesses you with something else,

or when you truly take in every precious element around you,

or when you embrace the sunset for the first time in days.

Yea, I live for sparkling moments like that.

Confidence is Key

When it comes to your job and what you do with your time, you need confidence!

When you head into a big meeting about to give a job-changing presentation, you need confidence!

When you set boundaries and morals for your own life, you need confidence!

When you look in the mirror, you need confidence!

When it's summer, and you are bare more often than not, you need confidence!

Confidence is KEY, especially in your 20's. You are respectfully the underdog in the work force, a newbie at bills and building your credit, still getting rid of college habits, learning to take care of yourself, and having to make tough choices that will affect your future such as your choice of friends and your career path. This is all completely and totally normal. Some of you have learned all of this earlier in life, depending on when you started out completely on your own, and some of you will not learn this until whatever leash you're on is indefinitely cut off.

But one key factor in getting by is CONFIDENCE. You have to believe you will make it no matter the circumstances you're in, you have to carry yourself confidently so others will believe in you, and you really just need to be your own best friend. If you are your own worst enemy, get to yoga class or read a self-help book because you do not want to be your own worst enemy! If you do not like what you see when you look at yourself, whether it be looks, where you're at in life, or who you are, YOU are the only one who can change that.

Confidence: full trust, belief in the powers, trustworthiness, or reliability of a person or thing.

BELIEVE IN YOURSELF, TRUST YOURSELF, RELY ON YOURSELF, AND BE CONFIDENT IN ALL THAT YOU DO!

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We are called to love, no matter what race, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social status, NO MATTER WHAT, we are called to love.

I'm so happy and proud of Steven Grand, who comes from my very own hometown. Some of my fondest memories of high school are hanging in the Grand's garage til' the wee hours of the morning listening to Bill (Grand), Steve, and the gang jam out. From stories I've heard, coming out to the family was a tough thing to do. I can only imagine the courage Steve had to have to do this. His musical talents are beyond extraordinary. If you get in a room with him, all you want to do is be serenaded by his vocals and instrumental abilities.

Today he has not only made a career path for himself playing in bars and for the church Sunday mornings, but he even funded his own music video on his own. Now he has half a million hits on his first video "All-American Boy" and counting. He will be a star, I just know it! Check out this video from Good Morning America this morning.

http://gma.yahoo.com/blogs/abc-blogs/gay-country-star-music-videos-unexpected-viral-success-154446342.html

Anything is possible, and dreams DO come true. Never stop dreaming, and remember folks, we are called to LOVE.

The Sun Must Set

"I know the Sun must set to rise." 

-Coldplay

“There's a sunrise and a sunset every single day, and they're absolutely free. Don't miss so many of them.” 

-Jo Walton

"Know what you want to do, hold the thought firmly, and do every day what should be done, and every sunset will see you that much nearer to your goal." 

-Elbert Hubbard

"Clouds come floating in my life, no longer to carry rain or usher storm, but to add color to my sunset sky." 

-Rabindranath Tagore

"A sunset has many interpretations, but the greatest of these is that God is watching over us."

-Myself

Lying is Murder

I believe it is time I start writing again. Wow, has it been what feels like forever. I initially stopped writing because the "Relationship" chapter of my Happiness Project began in February, and lets face it, I keep my relationship private. That's my way of protecting my relationship.

Some has changed, but most has not. I changed jobs to a current sales position that I enjoy very much. You learn a lot in sales. Everything else is pretty much the same. However, it IS warmer outside, I have a new car, and my four goldfish are still alive.

There is one thing I've observed over the past few months (again) that I'd like to share with you. A majority of my everyday life is spent working, working out, seeing friends, building my relationship, missing my family, etc. And EVERY tough situation, pickle, or adversity that I see people face, usually has to do with the same thing: Lying. This may be a repeat post, but I urge you to please listen up on this topic. Marriages end, friendships die, relationships break up, you go crazy, you become guilty and insecure, and you are paranoid. Nothing good comes from lying. And the lying I'm talking about does not include telling your friend she doesn't look fat when she may or not admitting to eating the last cookie. I'm talking about serious lying. Lying that breaks hearts, leaves scars, and leaves you in turmoil.

If you have to lie to someone either: a) just don't do it, you'll regret it later. or b) STOP LIVING A LIFE YOU HAVE TO LIE ABOUT. Now, no one is perfect, and everyone has their fair share of lying experience. But I just don't understand it. I don't have any polls or statistics on this, but it just seems like a majority of friendship and relationship problems that you face have everything to do with lying. Why do you want to have so many secrets? Why are you so ashamed? Why do you act upon situations that you have to lie about? Why must you lie to the people you say you love the most? I'm not a judge, or a jury for that matter. What you lie about is entirely up to you. You and I both know that life is much easier when you don't have to lie. So next time you are in a situation that you have to lie about, think twice about the possible outcome if you're caught. And think about how much time you are going to have to spend building up broken trust.

And lastly, if you are a pathological liar, or a frequent liar, who do you think you're fooling? It's not like your surroundings don't catch on to your lies, especially those close to you. You may be caught, and you don't even know it. Your friends and significant other could be trying to piece together your lies and soak in the betrayal you have shown. And now you'll be up all night wondering if you're caught and just don't know it yet.

See, lying sucks. In my opinion, lying is murder to life.

With the Angels

My great-grandma is now with the angels above. And as she is laid to rest today, I feel the need to share this story. I've only shared it with one other person so far.

Driving to church this past Sunday morning, we drove by a sign on the side of the highway that read Jesus is coming soon. I didn't want to jinx mine or my guy's flight home that day, so I said nothing about it. It really did pull at my heart once I found out my great grandmother has passed. Jesus really did come soon-less than an hour later to be exact. I am blessed to have seen her over Christmas break, gave her a hug and a kiss on the cheek, and told her I loved her.

There are so many meaningful moments in our everyday life. There are so many precious people on our lives, as well, that we may take for granted, or not realize how important we are to them or how important they are to us. Always strive to be the BEST you, and you will shine.

Rest with the angels Momma-Neen. You are dearly loved and missed.