More Love, Less Hate

Watching MSNBC's coverage of the Newtown shooting saddens me into an emotional place only I can reach deep within myself. So much is on my mind. From seeing my kiddies this week and appreciating the time I get with them much more than before after last week's elementary school shooting to how frustrated I can become with certain situations in my life to where did the weekend go and why couldn't the Bears take away a win from the Packers. I'm angry that the Bears didn't win today, and I'm angry that people who ask for help and need help, don't do anything to help themselves. I see, too often, others make decisions in life that I will never understand. And why should I even worry about it? It's not my life, not my choices, and not my consequences. I guess I just don't understand why anyone asks for help with no intention to help themselves. If you need advice or want help with a situation, another person can only do so much. A large part of help and change comes from within yourself. YOU have to want to change and grow and help yourself. Then, my mind moves on to the shooter of the terrible tragedy in Newtown, Connecticut. There are so many articles and news-casters discussing the real problem with Adam Lanza: Did he have a mental illness? Was he just crazy? Was he planning this alone? No one really knows. Either way, his actions were gruesome, heartbreaking, and just terrible. And only time will tell, if anything, what caused him to create such a tragedy. After that, my mind moves back to the loved ones in my life whom I just don't understand. I may not understand, and I may not be as patient as I used to be, but I need to love more and hate less. No matter what the situation, though I wish some would help themselves more, I do still love these people, and there is a special place in my heart for each and every person in my life. Instead of hating circumstances, hating situations, and hating other's actions, I need to focus on my own. I need to embrace the precious moments I get when a friend calls for help or another friend seeks advice. After all, we are all on this Earth together, sharing breaths and memories that will write our story. So tonight, as we listen to the President address Newtown, and we hold our loved ones a little closer, remember this week to have more love in your life and less hate.

Whatever you are going through tonight..."Only love can dig you out of this." -The Lumineers Slow It Down

Never Force What You Love

Never force what you love. Never feel forced to do something, anything. Just something else I read in The Happiness Project: Rubin tried keeping a daily journal, and initially had the idea to write everyday. Well, some days aren't as significant as others, and some days you just don't want to write. Rubin found that on some days she felt almost forced to write. So I made a new promise to myself about my blog: I will never feel forced to write. I love writing these blogs, and I love taking time to share my thoughts, insight, experiences, and precious daily moments that I have. But, if for whatever reason, I don't feel like writing, I will listen to myself. The same way we try to like someone we just don't like, or we try to love a food we just don't love-never try to force yourself to do what you love. You LOVE it after all. And your love for whatever it is came natural, so let doing it come natural.

Hope you are having a blessed Wednesday! And remember, never force what you LOVE!

Let Go

I have always been told that love and friendship should come easy. Family is more challenging due to the fact that you can't choose your family. You may never see eye to eye with your mom, dad, or siblings, but you sure love em' like crazy.

There have been many times that I have made my life harder than it has to be. For some reason, I enjoy working hard at friendships and love, but I'm starting to learn the meaning of that constant advice I've been given: love and friendship should come easy.

At this age, there is a lot of "work" to be done: work itself, enjoying the here and now, eating healthy, making it to the gym everyday, paying your bills on time. These all take work. And now I understand, if you have to work uber hard to keep some of your friendships and relationships around, you are probably working too hard. Friendships are a blessing. Friends keep you up when you're falling down. They support you, make you laugh, encourage you, and love you for YOU. That shouldn't be hard. If you are finding it hard to connect with an old friend or to have a friendship at all with that person, it's probably time to let go. I get bitter about this, because I do love all of my friends with all my heart, even the ones I've lost touch with. But I have learned the hard way to let go of friendships that bring you down, as they say. Make sure your friendships are a blessing in your life, not another challenge. And as for relationships? Refer to the "Partner=Best Friend" post.

Let go of what you need to let go of. What is supposed to be will be. And be grateful for those who are a blessing in your life today.

Be Loving

I have found yet another The Happiness Project quote to remember. The chapter regarding friendships includes a complete rundown of what to do to make your friendships strong and long-lasting. In this, Rubin includes a page of personal commandments that were sent to her by her readers. One that stuck out to me: Be loving and love will find you. 

There are many challenges every single day in my life and in yours that can make having a loving attitude very hard. I encourage you to fight this battle with me. I have a huge attitude that I try to keep to myself, I'm VERY stubborn, and I sometimes find it hard to be loving. Even if we feel as though we are loving enough, I can almost promise you that you can never love enough. Think about it. There is always something you wish you would've done: sent out Christmas cards the year before, remembered your friend's birthday, showed more affection, kept in touch with those you grew up with, etc. I've caught myself numerous times turning down a grocery isle, seeing someone I know, and turning right back around because I didn't feel like saying hello and engaging in quick conversation. Just pathetic on my part. To others, you ARE what they remember about you. If you are snotty and catty, you will be remembered as that. If you seem uninterested when you run into an old friend, that friend will remember that. If you ditch a birthday party or baby shower you RSVP'd to, that won't be forgotten (at least until the next one). If you lie, you will be remembered as a liar. If you are loving, you will be known as loving. I promise. When I think of old college friends or someone I used to know, I usually remember each person as I left them: college graduation or my last high school soccer game or a run-in with an old friend at Walgreens last week (I usually see someone I know every time I go to Walgreens, no joke). Leave a loving, lasting impression. Be who you want to be remembered as. 

I believe that good things come to good people. Now, I'm not saying that bad things don't happen because they do, inevitably. However, if you are loving, God will bless you with love, whether it be love in your family, friendships, or romantic relationships. If you love, you will be loved. Be loving and love will find you.